The Devil Is Against Me (and my blog)

Yes, sure that seems obvious, but hear me out. First Google just stops working and I lose half of my last post... so I restart it and try to remember what I said that most certainly was way better the first write. Then out of nowhere my computer restarts itself.  My almost brand new computer that my sweet husband got me for mothers day that has never had an issue Ever since I got it, up and restarted!!  This time I had saved my blog as I went along, but it got me to thinking... maybe I’m effecting something... or someone. Maybe I’m just effecting my own heart and spiritual well-being enough to cause some extra “irritation”. Maybe the devil wants me to quit this blog because if it’s irritating enough with all the other junk I have going on, maybe I’ll just give up.  

WELL BUDDY-- wrongo!  Jesus didn’t die on the cross and rise again to make my life safe and easy. He died to make me dangerous!!! And with danger will come difficulties and hardships... so not that I want to say bring it on... because I’m certain I’ve been pretty overwhelmed lately, but “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” (Philippians 4:13)  and gosh darn it, I’m going to LIVE that way, not talk that way!

Reflection Question: Are you living in a way that you’re dangerous to the devil? 

The Whale

It’s funny when you know where you are... and you know how to escape... but you can’t. And by funny, I of course mean that you have to laugh so you don’t cry kind of funny.

I am stuck in a place that goes against my very being. I am a doer, I am a go getter, I am an effector and I hate to admit it, but I’m a person who needs praise . My job right now has me stuck in a place where I not only don’t get any recognition really, but I don’t have much of an effect on meaningful things. I have people who work for me who don’t want to be there, who have more work than they have hours in the day, and they too would enjoy recognition for that hard work from more than just me... and it’s hard to come by.

One of my son’s favorite stories is Jonah and the Whale, and recently I had an idea that I am facing a Jonah time in my life. I know that my life has a purpose of serving God and not doing what I’m doing now, but I cannot physically leave for nine more months, so I sit... and pray... and continue to hope in the Lord that my day will come and that I will in fact be delivered from the belly of this whale.

This is a very hard place for me. I do not like to “be still and know that [He] is God” (Psalm 46:10). I want to DO. But there is truly a season for everything:

A Time for Everything

1 There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under heaven:
2 a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
3 a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
4 a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
5 a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
6 a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
7 a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
8 a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.
(Ecclesiastes 3:1-8 NIV)

I’m not going to learn much by always doing what I’m good at. The Holy Spirit is going to teach me by placing me where I need to be “purified”.

6In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7These have come so that your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9for you are receiving the goal of your faith, the salvation of your souls. (1 Peter 1:6-8 NIV).

So though it’s not comfortable and I wiggle sometimes, and I cry sometimes, here I sit trying to be still and know that He is God. I will appreciate my reward so much more when it comes at a price.

Reflection Question: How are you being purified by being taken out of your comfort zone right now? or how have you been in the past?

How Shall It Start?

I have put some serious thought into how to start this blog. I have thought "well I want it to be really meaningful and potent." but then again I have thought "...no one will probably read the early posts so maybe I should save my 'good stuff' for later". So in the end, I thought I would just start by putting my thoughts down as they came. If it was 'good stuff' hopefully someone will read it or maybe I'll get something out of putting my words down. If it's not so good stuff, well... it's the beginning and hopefully I'll get a break ;)

So here we go...

I have been reading Beth Moore's book "Believing God" and it has really moved me. I have actually read it once before in college, but so much has happened in my life since then I feel like I'm reading it for the first time.

The premise of the book is to actually believe God. Sounds simple... but really what we're thinking about is believing IN God. Actually believing Him is a different thought process all together. Do you believe you're beautiful? I mean, really beautiful, right now. Not what you looked like at 18 or not what you'd look like if you lost 20lbs, but really beautiful right now! God says you are... and THAT is believing Him. Think about how you would live differently if you believed you were beautiful. How would you act or react differently. Would you smile more? Would you be happier?

I have decided to believe God, which means to me today to act as though I'm beautiful. I'm going to stop putting myself down and making the comments like "if I was prettier" and hoping for someone to shoot me down and tell me that I am pretty. I am going to live it. It's hard to believe something that the media and world speak against, but at least today I can begin to LIVE it, and then I will begin to actually believe it!


Reflection Question: What will you do this week to help you believe God? How will you live as though you believe you are beautiful?